Much has been made of large families in the media recently; the birth of the Duggar’s 18th child, the adorable antics of the Gosselin kids, and dare I say it... Nadya Suleman’s multiples. While not all of the media attention has been positive, it’s certainly put a spotlight on the dynamics of large families. As the youngest of eight children, it has definitely grabbed my attention, and got me thinking about how the logistics of growing up in a large family have shaped my perspectives, and played a significant role in preparing me for a career in PR.
Here at New Media Strategies, I conduct Digital PR on behalf of television networks and film studios. I’m in constant communication with entertainment media outlets, our clients, and my colleagues... and, I love it. Communicating effectively with others, building strong and lasting relationships, and working hard to earn the trust and respect of those I work with are all a part of the job. But, those skills weren’t learned in a lecture hall, read in a book, or completely crafted during training sessions -- they all started at the dinner table... a very large dinner table.
Respect Your Audience. My parents sat at the ends of our kitchen table, and my siblings and I filled up the long sides, facing each other. This was the one time of day we all got together, and seemingly, the best opportunity to ask the burning questions like “can I borrow the car this weekend?” Dinner meant business. With seven older siblings, and seven agendas competing with mine, I learned pretty quickly that just because my parents were “available,” it didn’t necessarily mean they wanted to be bombarded. In fact, the bombardment factor often led to a resounding chorus of “no’s” from the parental units. They were much more apt to listen and respond to me if I communicated with them on their terms, after dinner, one on one, with full stomachs and open minds.
Learning to read the signs and abide by how and when my parents were most open to communicate didn’t always mean I got the keys to the car -- but, it showed respect, and that went a lot farther for me in the end than shouting over my siblings ever did.
As a PR professional, those early lessons in respectful communication have helped immensely. While conducting Digital PR, I’m looking for signs of how and when potential partners prefer to be reached. Sometimes it’s expressly written in the form of a “Dear PR person” note and other times, it’s not so blatant. I know that adhering to someone’s preferences isn’t an automatic guarantee that we’ll work together (remember: I didn’t always get the keys to the car), but it has opened up lines of communication that would otherwise have been severed if I hadn’t been respectful.
Know Your Audience. Let’s go back to that part about shouting over my siblings; it didn’t get me very far, and who can concentrate with all that noise? Getting shushed at the dinner table was the ultimate smack down, but I learned that it happened less frequently if I had something relevant to say, and once I had my parents’ attention, I didn’t need to shout. I didn’t have to do much research to know what would resonate with my family, I just needed to make sure that what I had to say was interesting -- that it mattered.
I don’t inherently know what’s going to be relevant or interesting to all of the media outlets that I’m going to pitch, but I do know that if I’m “shouting” (filling inboxes with irrelevant info) or creating “noise” (messages that aren’t targeted), I’m headed for the proverbial smack-down -- and rightly so. Building meaningful relationships starts with getting to know your audience. It’s digging deeper than the “about me” page, and getting a real sense for what is relevant and meaningful to an editor and their readers.
While being an effective PR professional entails much more than simply respecting and knowing your audience, it certainly sets a foundation for success. I was lucky enough to have that foundation laid long before I started working in PR. Now, if only I could go back in time and use my PR prowess to secure those car keys...
